ORANGES AT HALF TIME

ARE THEY ALL THEY'RE CRACKED UP TO BE?

The Baron's Oranges are GRRRRRRRREAT!

Win or Lose, the Spartans can always count on the Baron to provide them with yummy oranges at Half Time. In fact, this Custom is a main stay of Spartan football since 2009.

The Baron's oranges are grown in the southern part of Spain, where the land is hot yet the winds are cool. To cut costs, the owner sold his first born to some elves (pictured above) who in return provide low cost labour to maintain and pick only the finest of orange edibles.

And thus was born the favourite past time of the Spartan organization!

It also serves to keep the guys quiet while their coach, mentor, beloved Captain and caretaker rambles on about something that happened in that game they were playing. Where Tyler should have scored, or Mike should have passed to the side, or Scott shouldn't be playing with broken toes, or...well, you get the idea.

So ditch your favourite energy drink...or protein shake, or non-alcoholic beer at half time. You're in for a treat when the plastic container is open and you can dig those grubby hands in to a plethora of citrus goodness.

AHHHH! That's the ticket.

MAN OF THE MATCH:

Shawn (not Sean)

SCHWERPUNKT MAKES ITS DEBUT FOR SPARTANS

NEW IDEA OF ATTACK CREATES CONVINCING WIN!

What a way to play Football!

"Remember the Share Pint!" was the cry all over the field last Sunday as the Good Guys gave a good thrashing to the visiting opponents.

Earlier in the week, Coach Baron had brought his team together to demonstrate a new era in Football strategy.

"I felt that my team needed some guidance," explained Coach Baron,"Individually they're great. But they didn't know how to react. It was like numerous battle plans operating at once. Anarchy."

It didn't take long for even sceptics to take note.

Possession was pretty much all Spartans FC. Most of the game was played within the Darlington Crew half.

"The score could have been much higher," one fan laughed, having received a great pleasure in viewing the game.

Pundits noted that the Spartans hit the cross bar three times, and missed five open nets. But the results spoke for themselves.

Each time the SchwerPunkt was enacted, the Spartans delivered a furious attack that penetrated the enemy 18.

"That's SchwerPunkt for you," commented Baron, "and that's how we plan to play!"

STATS:
Kris (A)
Devon (G)
Spencer (GWA)
Kris (GWG)
Abe (A)
Mike A (G)
Abe (A)
Scott (G)
Abe (A)
Ryan (G)

NET:
Trevor

MAN O' THE MATCH:
Kris

SPARTANS FC DISASTER

MASS FLU FORCES "C" TEAM ON PITCH

Scott and Kevin sick on the Flu

Things were tense last Sunday, when the team's doctors disallowed most of the team from entering the pitch during a game with the Destroyers.

"It was awful in there," stated Baron," the guys were saying that England would win the world cup, and I just knew that they were under the weather."

With most of his main players out of action, Baron had to pull numerous reserves from the Spartans FC farm teams.

Although enough players were able to play, the competition was almost an embarrassment.

Fans jeered and booed the players, as they were thoroughly trashed.

"I can't remember the score," said one fan, "but I can tell you that this was the worst performance for a team of this calibre"

With the flu over this week's game promises to be better.

"I'm optimistic," Baron revealed, " we have a new plan, and the guys will redeem themselves!"

MAN OF THE MATCH
Mike A

FANS INCENSED

LINESWOMAN PLAYS TWELFTH "MAN"

Fans are incensed at the calls!

The Spartan's first game started out slow, but quickly escalated into something that will show promise for the season.

With the score tied in the 62nd minute at no score, our heroes were finally rewarded with a blistering shot that the Village Inn goalkeeper couldn't handle.

"And I really only got a piece of the ball," commented an elated Devon, who received the pass from a speedy partner in crime Spencer.

From there, the game turned, and not in a good way.

The Ref, not watching the match to the fullest, allowed the Lineswoman to award a penalty kick after a clean tackle by Anders in the box.

Reviews on the play clearly indicate Anders won the ball, and that the opponent fell over the redirected ball.

From there, the opponents scored a goal on a miscue by the defense.

To add to injury, the Village Inn scored another "goal" when clearly offside.

"I can't believe such rubbish!" yelled one commentator who stormed off the booth.

"The ball went to an offside opposing shirt, and then he passed the ball forward to his mate who was so clearly off side that the game stopped, waiting for the whistle," revealed Baron.

That was all it took for the fans to launch a tirade of anger against the field.

The Spartans will be fined one game's receipts, and are lucky at that. The error filled Lineswoman was escorted off field after contact lenses were thrown at her.

"We missed a lot of chances," analysed Baron," but our actions clearly showed that we could run with this top five team from last year. We just couldn't compete with the 12th woman official."

Scores:
Tyler (A) ***previously credited to Spencer
Devon (G)

Man of the Match
Trevor