STEVE RETURNS

HE PROMISES LOTS OF GOALS, MOSTLY ON THE OTHER NET!

Steve makes it to a popular card game!

"I'm just happy to be able to walk," commented Steve as he exercised on the treadmill for five minutes."I'm on a steady regimen of potato chips and pop. I'm ready. I mean, when else in my life have I been so fit in my life? Yeah, maybe in my twenties, but my member was smaller back then."

Spartan fans and supporters have been hoping for this moment ever since the prized defender was injured clipping his toes nails.

"And of course," recalled Captain Ian,"there was that internet scandal where Steve was sending pictures of his member to whoever wanted to watch. I thought the pictures were of a mushroom, but I guess Steve has some Asian in him."

"For the last time!" an annoyed Steve yelled at reporters," the picture was my big toe. And it was cold that day, not that I send pictures of myself like that Wiener guy in the States."

Gerry Dobson and Craig Forrest were intrigued by the developments in the Spartan back end.
"Forget all the Toronto FC hype," commented Gerry,"Steve will complete the back line, and allow the likes of superstar Justin and ex-Bundesliga player Baron to set up and score."
"That's right Gerry," Craig agreed on TSN at 6,"The Spartans should be pumped for their first game of the second half of the season."

TicketMaster reports that sales are high on the expected return, stating that almost 11 tickets have sold.