Referee Causes Calamity!

Darlington brings in another great asset

Word in today that Spartan Captain Ian has been brought up on allegations of hatred against the blind.

"All I said was that last game's ref was blind, to have made all those calls," retorted an angry Captain Ian,"I've never had anything against the blind."

"Captain Ian is obviously a closet rascist against the blind," said CNIB spokeswoman Natilla del Reya."No blind person would have ever made calls that bad."

The Spartans lost the game in what some call "the worst officiating of all time" at a Darlington game.

"I challenge the ball, and the next thing I know, I have a dirt and two knees sandwich," said mid-fielder Tyler, who was continuously gunned down by the opponents with no calls.

The final icing on the cake was a red card given to Forward Kevin.

"All I asked was if the Ref needed his glasses cleaned," said Kevin, after an opponent tossed the ball out of the 18 with his hands."I didn't know that the ref was semi-blind."

What followed was what one fan called "unbelievable".

"The ref kept shouting at this tree, telling it to leave the field. We weren't certain what he was on about. I think the only thing that saved the game was Baron's prelude to a beserker rage."

"All I know is Kevin got a red card for no reason, and then the ref goes off on some tangent. Look. I'm here to play Football, not walk around on 4 inch long grass all night for $200 a year," said an angry Baron, who took his antics a step further after the game, challenging the Ref to an "Iron Man Wrestling Match".

"Let it truly be said that Darlington doesn't bring their best officials to these games," said Captain Ian, " so we're stuck with whoever gets out last from the Tartan Saturday night."

The Tartan had no comment.